Why We Cheat Spouses in happy marriages have affairs. What are we all looking for? By Hanna Rosin Just because they’re happy together, doesn’t mean they’re not sleeping with others.Photo by Gary Houlder/Thinkstock We would all like to believe that affairs are the refuge of the discontented, that only people in unhappy marriages cheat. But […]
You Can Save Your Marriage From Divorce
It’s NOT Too Late To Save Your Relationship And Return to The Love You Once Had!I know because I have helped hundreds of couples all over the world go from a marriage in crisis to an even better, passionate, connected relationship than they started with.
There is hope that you can turn things around but you need to understand there are things that will make you become closer and there are things you want to avoid doing because they will tear you farther apart. I will teach you the do's and don'ts for reconnecting.
Have you found yourself having the same arguments with your partner time and time again? Have you figured out a way to avoid them, or have you just given up on the relationship completely?
Are you growing farther and farther apart and one of you is even talking about ending the marriage or telling you they are leaving? It's so hurtful to feel you about to lose someone you love so deeply.There are few things more painful than relationship troubles. You may have just found out your spouse is having an affair - or is withdrawn and hard to reach. As a matter of fact, you may be barely speaking to each other let alone receive affection or a kind word. You may now feel like just roommates sleeping as far away from each other as possible. It may have gone a step further than that with one of you moving to another bedroom or sleeping on the couch. Betrayal, heartbreak, disappointment, resentment, and just plain feeling let down by your partner is the deepest pain we can know. That pain gets even worse when it feels as if our relationship is failing and falling apart. All you want to do is make the pain stop and get back that passionate, connected relationship you once had - that or run out the door. You just don’t know what to do or where it will ever end. We all bring baggage to our love life, whether that’s from parents who had relationship troubles of their own, or past relationships that we couldn’t fix. The tentacles of those issues can work their way into our current relationships and trip us up, especially when our partner is dealing with similar issues of their own. We bring unhealthy patterns and bad habits that get in between the two of us and tear us even farther apart. None of this is intentional. I don't know one single person that has set out to destroy the very one they looked so forward to having in their life. We just forget to give that person what we did so naturally in the beginning. We lose our way. One of the primary ways these problems manifest is in our arguments; you know, the ones that never seem to end and pop up when you least expect? They can feel horrible. They may even feel like they suck the life right out of you. You may feel like all hope is lost, but if there’s one thing I know that can help you save a relationship, it's to do something about this now before it gets any worse. Knowing what action to take can make the difference between losing everything or creating something wonderful. Some behaviors you have right now will need to be changed. There will be new relationship skills to learn to help to keep things on track. And there will be some digging to do to get down to the root cause so that it never returns. That is what I am really good at. Here's how… Ending the Arguments by Reconnecting in a different way than ever before. Relationship Troubles are a sign that something is going on in us as an individual. The feeling that seems to pop up most when people are trying to save a relationship is frustration. It’s an angry, resentful feeling that comes to life when you feel you’re all out of options and your relationship troubles are too much to bear. You may think that life would be so much easier if those specific problems you and your partner have, those power struggles, sleepless nights, and unique relationship troubles, were to walk out and disappear; then you wouldn’t be angry; then you wouldn’t be frustrated: and most definitely wouldn't feel exhausted and worn out. Don't allow fears and doubts to race through your mind and take hold of your actions. Try this instead:
- Break it down to what you need to do now - right in this moment
- Know there is a solution to your relationship problems
- Even though I am so angry, hurt, and frustrated with [name your partner] I believe in us
- Call me - I will help you through this